When this year started like most we had goals. To get specific each year our church participates in First Fruits. It’s an offering of anticipation for the year. Bart and I decided this year the need we were attaching to our first fruit offering was financial stability and having a baby. We were so ready and expecting God to move in a mighty way for us. We gave our offering in February and we stayed excited to see what the year would hold.

April 5th I decided to take a pregnancy test at work and was floored that for the first time there were 2 bright lines on the test. I couldn’t believe it. God was giving us the one thing we had been wanting for a very long time. I couldn’t wait to tell my husband! When I came home I got creative and told him I needed him to help me make a video to win some free makeup. He was so confused but totally committed to helping. I will never forget how happy he was and how excited I was to finally tell him, he was going to be a daddy. It was the most amazing and emotional moment for us. Not long after we got to share with our church family that God had answered our prayer and the love and support we got was just incredible. We actually had diapers sitting next to our car when church was over. We always celebrate with people when God blesses them or something amazing happens, I love seeing people happy, but it felt indescribable to have a moment where we celebrated what God had done for us.

Each doctors appointment I had Bart was right there. He wanted to be apart of every moment every step of the way. To be honest being a dad is all Bart has ever wanted and after having moments of wondering if I could give him his dream I was just thankful it was happening. We learned our due date was December 12 and Bart was already asking when we could learn our gender. The doctor told us I was healthy and everything looked amazing. Our baby had a strong heart beat! Each week we checked my app to see how the baby was growing, what size it was, all the little exciting things you do when you’re having a baby. We were enjoying all of it. We knew we were meant to be parents, we understood now more than ever God needed us to grow and mature before we were ready for this big blessing. We knew life was about to change adding our little one and we were so ready.

Sometimes things happen in life that are so unexpected. Before they happen you always think you know how you may handle it or how you may get through it but until those moments happen and you’re put to the fire, you don’t truly know how you will hold up. If you have hung in this far stay with me. Part 2 of this will be difficult. It will be hard to read if you have been there, if you haven’t it may be hard because let’s be real sometimes things are difficult to fathom until you’re walking through it or walking with someone going through it. Just know not all hard stories have bad endings. God is still writing my story. He is still teaching and growing me and my family. He has never left our side once during this season.

When it gets hard, when your world is turned upside down will you run? Or will God find you on your knees crying out to the only One who can heal?